It might come as a surprise to many of you to hear that I find many things in life annoying. The fact that, despite my best efforts, the lawn refuses to die so I still have to mow it. The fact that where I live everyone is apparently a builder. Those flies that pretend to be bees, they’re bloody annoying and unnerving in equal measure. Also the sight of people in a face mask winds me up for reasons I have not yet fully come to understand. What really gets my goat though are the experts. You know, social media experts.

Wherever you go on social media there are people queuing up to share their expertise of virology and government procedures in dealing with pandemics. They try to appear as if they know the ins and outs of a cats arse about everything despite having only read a few headlines and posts by other experts. They then try to beat you to death with their argument. Now, I don’t claim to be particularly clever. I’m not an expert on anything I can think of and like most people I bounce around simply trying to make sense of everything around me (often failing miserably). Yet someone who, prior to the Covid outbreak, mostly posted about Love Island or those dreadful Kardashian people is basically an adviser to the World Health Organisation.

You can’t bloody move for these people. Three weeks ago they thought PPE was something you could claim back and now they’re banging saucepans outside their house for the NHS every Thursday and carefully explaining as to how Boris Johnson is the second coming of Pol Pot. Now, I’m all for people having opinions but for pity’s sake please remember they are an opinion based on nothing more than an interpretation of a headline by some other barm pot on Twitter you clicked like on.

It’s easy to point fingers, we all do it, but it’s not too difficult to get at least a basic education as to why you should be pointing a finger. Most issues of this magnitude are immensely complex and fraught with agony at every turn. Am I really to believe Chantel, a fashion blogger from West Bromwich, has all the answers?

Of course this is nothing new. After 9/11 we witnessed the sudden explosion (no pun intended) in concrete specialists and hologram visionaries. Then the financial crash saw these same people turning their genius towards global finance and politics. Not to mention the sheer malevolent genius of the New World Order has been uncovered time and again by some bloke on YouTube who doesn’t get out of his house too often and isn’t allowed within 100 metres of a school (no offence, obviously,  but if you think I’m talking about you then I probably am. The NWO are the least of your worries).

The main issue is that all of these experts come together in a self affirming bubble. Whereas prior to social media they’d have been the person muttering at the bus stop that everyone avoided now they have friends. People who will, no matter how barking mad the theory, give you a virtual clap on the shoulder and tell you how right you are. They become a puddle of mental and stupidity who quickly attack anyone who questions their narrative all the while complaining that they’re being silenced.

Spare us the experts, please! We’ve got enough problems.

 

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